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Proverbs 19:11 (KJV) - The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression.

There are some situations that make us very upset. When confronted, we can consider many ways to handle the situation. If we are using discretion, we would defer our anger, but in a lot of cases people choose to address the situation (especially situations where we feel wronged).

In those situations, we want to address the problem to bring correction, confrontation (just for the sake of it), or to be right. We would want the other people to know not to mess with us, to prove them wrong, or accomplish some other purpose not founded in love.

1. A person of good discretion (understanding, prudence, insight) will defer their anger. In the situations where we feel wronged, anger is one of the emotions that fuel our intentions. We are upset that we’ve been confronted, embarrassed, treated wrongly, etc.

A person of such good insight however, would hold back their anger for an extended period of time. As James 1:19 states, we should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. The purpose behind this is that anger is such an emotionally charged behavior that you can lose control over your behaviors and act out in mindless, evil, and revengeful aggression. When you are angry, you will speak all of your in your mind…and not the best of it.

2. Watch the contents of your heart. When your heart begins to churn with angry thoughts, it will continue to build, grow, and fill your being. Your heart, mind, and life begin to consume itself with the wrong that has been committed against you and the means for you to take your revenge. The closing part of Luke 6:45 says, that ‘…for of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.’ If you think about revenge, payback, hate, and evil all day, why should you be surprised if you act out in one of those behaviors?

When your heart is captured by anger, it is not a matter if you will lash out, but when.

3. Deferring your anger allows you to see the 'bigger' picture. When you hold your anger, it allows you to see the situation for what it truly is. There are some situations that are small compared to what our actions of anger would have produced as a result. When we are angry, we only see the narrow path of wrong committed against us. We do not consider our own souls or those around us when we are angry, only revenge. Waiting to speak and become angry allows us to take that deep breath and pray instead of acting out.

4. It is to your glory to pass over a transgression. When a transgression has been committed against you, it is to your benefit (honor, splendor) to pass over it. When you pass over something, it would mean you (purposefully) chose to step over it or move beyond it. It is not something you stopped in front of, but moved away from.

Pass over the transgressions and forgive (even if the other person (or people) do not apology). An apology is not necessary to forgive.

Matthew 5:3-12 (KJV) - Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted. Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth. Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled. Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God. Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you.