Counseling
There are many times in our lives when we don’t want to be godly. We want to hate, be angry, not forgive, and be outright ugly. We want revenge and show we’re not ‘the one’ to mess around with. We allow our anger to take over and take the lead in our lives, but in these moments, we must set our sights on another way.
Don’t judge me!
How many times have you heard someone make this statement?
Many times the person that makes this statement may need to be corrected for some wrongdoing on his or her part. However, a misinterpretation of scripture can produce greater strife and separation than restoration and peace.
Deuteronomy 1:10-17 – The Lord your God hath multiplied you, and, behold, ye are this day as the stars of heaven for multitude. (The Lord God of your fathers make you a thousand times so many more as ye are, and bless you, as he hath promised you!) How can I myself alone bear your cumbrance, and your burden, and your strife? Take you wise men, and understanding, and known among your tribes, and I will make them rulers over you. And ye answered me, and said, The thing which thou hast spoken is good for us to do. So I took the chief of your tribes, wise men, and known, and made them heads over you, captains over thousands, and captains over hundreds, and captains over fifties, and captains over tens, and officers among your tribes. And I charged your judges at that time, saying, Hear the causes between your brethren, and judge righteously between every man and his brother, and the stranger that is with him. Ye shall not respect persons in judgment; but ye shall hear the small as well as the great; ye shall not be afraid of the face of man; for the judgment is God’s: and the cause that is too hard for you, bring it unto me, and I will hear it.
When Moses appointed men to assist him in judging among the children of Israel, he established specific requirements:
1. They should not be a respecter of persons. This will ensure everyone will be heard without any specific prejudice or undo influence (i.e. bribe).
2. They will hear small and great cases. This would allow everyone to be treated fairly. One person or will not be considered more important than another.
Reference: Joshua 9:3-27
God told Moses that they were to smite and utterly destroy the inhabitants of the lands they were to possess (Deuteronomy 7:1-2). The neighboring country of Gibeon was in fear of their lives and sought to deceive the Israelites (Joshua 9:24). To act as if they were from a far country, they came to them with old sacks upon their donkeys, old wine bottles, old shoes, old garments, and even dry and moldy bread (Joshua 9:4-6). Though the men of Israel suspected they were of the neighboring country, the men made their decision without consulting the Lord on the matter. Joshua then made a league with them to let them live, and the princes of the congregation swore unto them.
When they travelled through Gibeon to destroy the city, the Israelites were reminded of their oath, though they were deceived. Joshua honored his oath and allowed them to live. The people of Gibeon became bondmen, and hewers of wood and water for the altar of the Lord (Joshua 9:22-27).
Be mindful to seek the counsel of the Lord before entering into agreements, contracts, and business arrangement with others.
Photo courtesy of iStockphoto.com/skvoor
1. Be available. Windows of opportunity come unexpectedly.
2. If the opportunity to counsel came upon you suddenly, say a short prayer. Your prayer should focus on the Lord assisting the person; receiving an answer from the Lord; and the root issue is revealed.
3. They should speak more than you. Keep your comments short, simple, and to the point.
4. Allow the other person to tell their story – to share their heart.
Galatians 6:1 – Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.
It is no light matter to be called of God to restore people in the faith. Jesus says blessed are the peacemakers for they will be called the children of God (Matthew 5:9). It is a humbling sight to witness the return and growth of those that had been overtaken by a fault. However, there are a few things they must consider:
1. They must be spiritual. Paul states makes a distinction for those that are to assist those overtaken in a fault – the spiritual (spirit-filled, spirit-led). The person desiring to assist them cannot be in flesh-filled and flesh-led. If the person trying to restore someone operates in the flesh, the person in the fault will only be further trapped and bound to their sin (and possibly other spirits as well).
2. Those overtaken in sin must be restored in a spirit of meekness. One of the definitions of meekness is the ability to be patient and long suffering. Some folks will not want to ‘do right’ because you said a few words, and busting down the doors of sin in someone’s life is not always a 1,2,3 process. Those that are not meek, patient, or willing to ‘suffer long’ with others will abort the process of restoration before it comes to fruition. In today’s society, many people want to say a few words and if it doesn’t work, they’ll leave them alone because they don’t want to waste their time. But not so for those that are spiritual. Just as the Lord is patient (and gracious and merciful) with us, we should exercise just as much patience toward those we desire to see restored.
3. Consider thyself, lest thou also be tempted. Know your own spiritual/physical/mental/emotional temperament. Stay on your guard to protect you from allowing temptation into your life. There are several things you should consider:
- If you’re not considering your own life, you become tempted to sexual relationship with that individual. The person may seek affirmation (from you) through physical touch.
- You may become angry with something the person says and speak harshly to them. Your words or actions would cut more than heal. This may be especially evident if the person is speaking about a subject that is emotional for you. If you are unable to properly contain your emotions, you want to consider whether you are the proper person they should speak with.
- You must also watch out for pride to rise up in you as you see the manifestation of restoration in the lives of others, something you may desire for your own life. Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep (Romans 12:15).
- You must protect yourself any spirits you encounter while counseling. You may counsel someone and find the same circumstances manifesting in your life and home within days of the counseling. After counseling sessions, be sure to pray (to bind the spirits), anoint yourself (and home), pray in the Spirit, and remain watchful for anything that could remotely sprout.
As one who restores others, you are in a position of trust to hold the fragile pieces of someone’s life. Consider your temperament at all times so you will not see their weakness as an advantage for you.
Restoration is not on a timetable. Just because one person doesn’t repent in the amount of time you think it should take, it doesn’t mean they’re lost forever. This is why it’s important to be spiritual and meek. You must be willing to go the distance and not become angry or impatient because ‘change’ does not occur by your timetable.
Don’t play around with this!!! You must be on your guard. Remain watchful and consider yourself!
Photo courtesy of Photo courtesy of Stock.XCHNG.com/JauresVillani
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